Life Changes – The Big Move

To move to California or to move into a downtown apartment with Hana. That is the question of the next 3 months. Our lease is up July 31st, and I was set on option #2, but something triggered the California dream once more today. I was walking on the track at my gym, just leisurely….

Drunk

I’m drunk and I feel as if I’m on the prowl. I am single and ready to mingle. But the mingle isn’t ready for me. I’m sitting at a table, Erin’s friends are around chatting. I could be chatting too but I’m not. Probably because I’m too focus on being on the prowl. Why? Because…

Lessons Learned from Yesterday’s Splurge

What went well yesterday: I was really productive at work and am doing a good job at managing my workload/time I ate when I was hungry and stopped when I was full I walked because I wanted to move and had nothing else I wanted to do I walked with pups in the morning I…

Not Doing Anything

Sitting silently situated on a couch I am defiantly doing nothing now I use to ache for action and excitement But now I yearn for peace & enlightenment I hear your purpose is slow to come Purpose is purposely different for everyone The world would be bland if we were all the same Yet ironically…

Gossip

Gossip may be the death of me. This is something I hate to partake in, but sometimes I do to appease the gossiper. I use to do this a lot more, but I lately I have been making it a point not to and to question the gossiper. Someone I’m close to went straight to…

How to Stop Binge Eating Through Free Eating

This is a work in progress post. I’ve only written up to stage 2 which is the stage I am in. One day, I hope to complete the stages guided by my own up to date experiences. The final stage being complete recovery! Free eating is a style of eating that is my own version of…

Not a Binge

My support friend and I have been trying something different. We have been repeating to ourselves that no food is bad. I have been ordering and eating what I want, with the goal of stopping when I’m full. For one week now, I have not had a binge on this method. That doesn’t mean I…

Worry Wart 1

1. I will eat what’s there 2. No food is bad Tonight I can’t go to BJJ bc I have a cold sore. I don’t want it to burst and hurt.  My anxiety over weight gain is flaring up. 1. I’m at my brothers which is a trigger 2. I’m really hungry. 3. I can’t…

WENTI + Recovery Update

WENTI Walk in the morning Eat what’s there No food is bad Talk isn’t stary I am enough Walk in the Morning: Cheeto and Chester needs their exercises each day. Cheeto, especially needs his arthritic back legs to be exercised. I need to get my blood going first thing in the morning. I added in…

Recovery is Scary

Goal:  Heal relationship with food and live a life free from an eating disorder. Recovery Method: Eat when I want but really observe how I feel Eat what I want without labeling it good or bad Work towards being guilt free after eating what I want Exercise for the feeling rather than the calorie burn…

Day 2 Morning Tracking

I woke up this morning without feeling guilty, even though I snacked last night. I put my sports bra on and intended to run with Chester in an effort to maintain the same activity level as I had before – running in the morning and BJJ in the evening. I didn’t follow through though. The…

Day 1 of Freedom Eating

I’ve been eating what I want, and snacking when I feel like it. Although I do this, it is not guilt free. I still get the feeling that I need to eat better tomorrow to not gain weight. But, I’m not going to. I’m going to continue what I’m doing. Cravings can be controlled and…