1. I will eat what’s there
2. No food is bad
Tonight I can’t go to BJJ bc I have a cold sore. I don’t want it to burst and hurt.
My anxiety over weight gain is flaring up. 1. I’m at my brothers which is a trigger 2. I’m really hungry. 3. I can’t workout. 4. I ate chips and a chicken salad sandwich for lunch.
I’m going to gain weight and all the adoration I had for my weight loss will be reversed. Others will think ‘I knew it wouldn’t last’.
I must remember. This is about me and my recovery. Right this moment, these are antique thoughts that are dragging me down. Recovery is hard. Weight will be gained. But the goal is to no longer binge eat.
No food is bad. Eat what’s there. My instincts have yet to fail me. It won’t fail me now. I must let go of control to take back control. The weight gained will be recovery happy weight. My next steps will be to make smarter choices after bad foods are no longer automatic bad foods. Instead, healthy food will be preferred because it makes me feel good. Skipping the gym or a workojr want trigger anxiety either.