Control

I binged again last night.  I’m releasing control today and beyond.  Control…. Control….. Control: the actions that one takes as a means to a desired end.  I sincerely believe that everything that happens has values. That’s a statement that mimicks ‘everything happens for a reason’, but doesn’t rely on fate or destiney.  In telling Erin…

Quick Updates

Some points of this post: Back to Free Eating The Secret is Out – Erin Knows The Need to be Perfect Binging as Unwinding Smile Direct Club My Default is Dirty Team Growth = Personal Growth PHP Learning Back to Free Eating: Last night I binged. Today, I realized I trailed off a bit from…

Negativity + Awareness + Humility = Growth 

Some days I love myself. I am confident, I feel beautiful inside and out, I feel like a good person overall. Some days, like today, I feel really down about myself. Like dominoes, one occurrence perceived as negative leads to another, until I am bashing my character and my intent at the end of the…

Lessons Learned from Yesterday’s Splurge

What went well yesterday: I was really productive at work and am doing a good job at managing my workload/time I ate when I was hungry and stopped when I was full I walked because I wanted to move and had nothing else I wanted to do I walked with pups in the morning I…

Not a Binge

My support friend and I have been trying something different. We have been repeating to ourselves that no food is bad. I have been ordering and eating what I want, with the goal of stopping when I’m full. For one week now, I have not had a binge on this method. That doesn’t mean I…

WENTI + Recovery Update

WENTI Walk in the morning Eat what’s there No food is bad Talk isn’t stary I am enough Walk in the Morning: Cheeto and Chester needs their exercises each day. Cheeto, especially needs his arthritic back legs to be exercised. I need to get my blood going first thing in the morning. I added in…

Recovery is Scary

Goal:  Heal relationship with food and live a life free from an eating disorder. Recovery Method: Eat when I want but really observe how I feel Eat what I want without labeling it good or bad Work towards being guilt free after eating what I want Exercise for the feeling rather than the calorie burn…

Day 2 Morning Tracking

I woke up this morning without feeling guilty, even though I snacked last night. I put my sports bra on and intended to run with Chester in an effort to maintain the same activity level as I had before – running in the morning and BJJ in the evening. I didn’t follow through though. The…

Day 1 of Freedom Eating

I’ve been eating what I want, and snacking when I feel like it. Although I do this, it is not guilt free. I still get the feeling that I need to eat better tomorrow to not gain weight. But, I’m not going to. I’m going to continue what I’m doing. Cravings can be controlled and…

One Month of Intuitive Eating (Vien’s Style)

I am back on this wagon (Vien’s style because I didn’t read a book about it). My goal is to normalize foods that I have engrained as off limits in my subconscious. I am prepared to gain a bit of weight because I will be eating fatty & greasy foods I kept myself away from…

Tools to Move Forward With

What Went Well Yesterday: I sat with boredom without binging I played guitar and made music I went to Jiu Jitsu Although I binged, I drank a lot of water and didn’t eat as much as I could have eaten What I’ll Work on Today: Be mindful throughout the day Be mindful when the urge…

Hello Diary, My Old Friend

I’m here to speak with you again…. What Went Well Yesterday: I volunteered to design a newsletter for TAG slog & it turned out pleasant New work at work gives me excitement, makes me realize I don’t like repetitive work Went to no gi BJJ training for the first time and it was fun, I’m…